On Not Laughing

One of my friends took a big risk yesterday. She sent me part of a copy of a story she's been writing. I think I'm one of the first people to read it, and I'm honored 1) that she chose me and 2) that I'm allowed to edit! It's a huge responsibility- someone's hopes and dreams there in your hands, or on a computer screen. I'm also really proud of her for even sending it to me. For her, I think it's a huge step forward in sharing her work with the world.

And it should be shared, because my friend is a fantastic writer. She blogs, and even though I wasn't originally supposed to know about her blog, and found it completely by accident, I love reading her posts. Her philosophies and point of view are so original and completely accurate. And I can't say enough good things about her writing style- she's lyrical, with just enough emotion to convey her ideas, but enough esoterica to keep it anonymous.

One of her recent posts expressed a fear of people laughing at her and her writing. She is completely entitled to that, as are we all. Everyone will be ridiculed at some point in their lives, whether it be for something stupid they wrote, said, or did, or something deeper, like sexual orientation or religion. It's part of human nature to laugh, but not to ridicule. There is a huge difference between lighthearted laughter and cruel, pointed snickering. I may laugh at my friend for walking into a wall, but I would never make fun of someone for being gay, lesbian, or transgendered, or Christian or Muslim or Jewish. I have friends who fall under all those categories. If I laughed, I'd be alienating friends extremely quickly.

But back to my friend. I'm doing the opposite of laughing right now. I just read through her story, and I'm in awe. I could never write something that good. I know her fears are well founded, as she doesn't like to share her work, but I am extremely glad I am one of those who gets to view it.

I am definitely not laughing.

Perils of the Internet

I love the Internet. It's one of the greatest inventions in the near past, in my opinion. However, there are some times when I just don't understand why people say the things they say or act the way they do.

My friend has been getting college emails, and this past week she got one from the University of Advancing Technology. Being the nerds that we are, we immediately started trolling their website, and we found a "what kind of geek are you?" quiz. We took it, and had a good time. Thinking our friends would like it, we emailed it to some people and she posted it on Google Buzz. This of course set off a flurry of activity, and the inevitable rain of comments.

When asked to describe herself, one of my friends usually says "hipster before hipster was cool", "indie", or "so hipster even hipsters think I'm hipster", or something along those lines. So of course she has a complete disdain for Nerdfighteria and all it entails, it being too mainstream and "fake", in her opinion. So she posted something on the quiz being like "alpha geek, I really know what I'm about, unlike you sissy Nerdfighters" (not an exact quote). So I posted back saying "Nerdfighter is different from geek." And she went off on a paragraph long rant about how Nerdfighters are (and here I quote), "asinine", "moronic", etc.

So much for friends respecting friends.

Accidentally

I did a bad thing today. I snooped. And I didn't even mean to.

A friend of mine has a blog. I know she reads this blog. I know she wanted to keep her blog a secret. That didn't bother me, because everyone is entitled to secrets. I was in no way trying to pry, but I still feel terrible.

What's the likelihood of this type of thing happening? Maybe a million to one? There's this interesting little thing on all the Blogger-style blogs that allows you to see the "next blog", which I think refers to blogs that are similar to yours. So I was casually clicking through the blogs, because that's how I find interesting new things to read.

And then BAM. I see a good looking blog with an interesting title that contains a word I don't know. This word intrigues me, so I start reading. I read the first post, and it's quite good. Then I look at the little "About Me" box.

Shit. It's my friend, or it's pretty damn likely. And now I feel terrible, because I know she didn't want me to find it, accidentally or otherwise. But the writing is so amazing, and now I know it's there, so it's going to nag at me like a loose tooth. Can't stop worrying at it, and worrying about it.

Too Many Secrets

Everyone has secrets. That's fine. What's not fine: making that fact blatantly obvious and then only sharing with certain people. Or saying "oh, you wouldn't understand." That may be true, but I'd understand a lot better if you told.

Everyone has secrets. That's fine. What's not fine: having a secret and keeping it so close no one knows until it's too late.

Everyone has secrets. That's fine. What's not fine: letting your secrets explode all at once. Drama is never good.

If you have a secret, tell someone if it's destructive, don't wave it in someone's face if it affects them, and don't let them all out at once. Basic rules of life.